# Let it be inevitable - a story #Unfinished He was in it. Up and down. Too weak to force a resolution, too strong to give in. Weeeee and woe. When things got bad he'd curse his multitudes. His boyhood was bright but it ended early and it ended abruptly. He told himself that he was thankful for the difficult years because they made him. He'd say that "steel was forged in fire", hoping that just like it, he had been made strong too. If you knew him, you knew he was different. On good days, he had a lucid heart, clearly full of love. On bad days, it didn't look like love. It looked like weariness and it sounded like heartbreak. He hated words but he couldn't stop writing love letters. He wanted to capture the beauty he saw, to save it, to share it. When he wasn't lost in the past or worrying about the future, he was there in the in-between. You'd see his breathing deepen and his shoulders relax. When he was with you, he made you feel seen. He'd look at you like there was something special behind your eyes. You knew he wanted to stay there in the now with you, but then he'd look away. He'd occasionally talk about his struggles with eye-contact, guessing it started from a place of fear in his childhood, but the truth was a little more nuanced. When he really gave you his attention, he'd fall in love, just a little and that scared him. Love is not an easy emotion. It demands action. From a young age, he knew animals were one of the best things about life. He could stare at animals and so there was no surprise that he loved them. That love eventually saved him. When he was about 10, life became harder than it should be for a boy his age. He struggled and he adapted. By 14, his boyhood was done, his home was gone. He'd been thinking about killing himself for a couple years. He had been loving himself less and less, slowly letting the world wear him down, until one day something clicked. Animals didn't deserve to suffer, no one did. This realization changed something in him. He had purpose, a cause to pour himself into. His name was Hew, we were in love once. This is his story. When I met him, it was clear he he had huge heart. No one fought for animals the way he did without a heart full of love, but there was also a lot of anger in those early years. Anger is like fire, an indiscriminate force, that'll consume what ever you let it. His had been a potent source of motivation, but it also had a tendency to turn inward and was misdirected often. Anyone that knows him, knows this is a love story, but I'm going to be honest. It was his anger that pushed me away. It was his anger that began to hold him back. He'll tell you he fell in love with me that morning I was there for a crow in need, but love doesn't work like that. Falling in love is a process, it is made up of many little moments. The fact that he remembers me helping a crow as the crystallising moment he fell in love with me just speaks to his own depth of love for the world. Fade to black...Gollum bites the narrator.